Forty-four. The number of days left before I return to my home. My sweet home. The thought sends a pulse of happiness through my body. Before I go to bed, I imagine myself coming out of the airport gate, the outstretched hands of my mother waiting to embrace me, my beloved standing beside her, beaming. I imagine going out with my friends and play football in the dust ridden field of Gulshan Youth Club. I imagine going to an adventure in Bandarban. The thoughts keep on piling on. They are sweet thoughts. But then another thought pokes in, and it kills me from inside. After my summer vacation, I have to come back here.
I am extremely lucky to be studying in such a prestigious university (if you say otherwise, get the heck out of my blog -_-). Any one will be lucky to come here. But still the thought melts my inside. I have to say good bye to my family again. Play my last football game with my friends. Have a last look at my beloved. And then who knows when I will be back home. Life is only going to get harder and more complicated.
I miss my school days. Before the exam days, we only wanted the exam week to be over. And during vacations, we were sad when it ended. But we were not overly demoralized because we knew we were going to get another vacation after 3-4 months. Jumping from one year to another, we were oblivious to life, as the same routine ensued: school starts, exam starts, vacation starts, another year of school starts. But now, the beautiful, comforting routine gave away to a complex algorithm where you go where the tide of life takes you. You get long vacations but you also get offered to do awesome internships and/or research which you cannot refuse. Before, you know you will be able to do whatever you want after your exams. Here, you know nothing (just like Jon Snow).
The worst thing is, I don't know when I can truly call Dhaka my home again. After graduation? Am I going to go back and live there? I don't know. Will I live in America? I have no freaking idea! That is what life has boiled down to: uncertainties. You wait for opportunities to poke around and grab them. I hope an opportunity comes so that I can live in my home without sacrificing my career or education.
I am extremely lucky to be studying in such a prestigious university (if you say otherwise, get the heck out of my blog -_-). Any one will be lucky to come here. But still the thought melts my inside. I have to say good bye to my family again. Play my last football game with my friends. Have a last look at my beloved. And then who knows when I will be back home. Life is only going to get harder and more complicated.
I miss my school days. Before the exam days, we only wanted the exam week to be over. And during vacations, we were sad when it ended. But we were not overly demoralized because we knew we were going to get another vacation after 3-4 months. Jumping from one year to another, we were oblivious to life, as the same routine ensued: school starts, exam starts, vacation starts, another year of school starts. But now, the beautiful, comforting routine gave away to a complex algorithm where you go where the tide of life takes you. You get long vacations but you also get offered to do awesome internships and/or research which you cannot refuse. Before, you know you will be able to do whatever you want after your exams. Here, you know nothing (just like Jon Snow).
The worst thing is, I don't know when I can truly call Dhaka my home again. After graduation? Am I going to go back and live there? I don't know. Will I live in America? I have no freaking idea! That is what life has boiled down to: uncertainties. You wait for opportunities to poke around and grab them. I hope an opportunity comes so that I can live in my home without sacrificing my career or education.
Comments
Post a Comment
Feel free to criticise my work,it will only make me better..!